Emerson's Birthday 2008

Today is Emerson's birthday but we had his party yesterday.  Here is a little of the action from the party...

 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMERSON !

Austin's Birthday 2008

My calendar is saying that today is Austin's birthday.  Why didn't you all celebrate it while Jennie and I were in Florida so I could have gotten some of the birthday cake?    Wait a minute, I think I just answered my own question.

 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUSTIN !

Most Repeated Quotes

As there is anytime a bunch of the StalkerClan gets together, there were lots of funny things said and done while we were at Jeff and Randy's.   It seems there is always at least one quote that catches on and gets repeated over and over again.  This trip there were at least two that I can recall.

The first had to do with Bryan's big fish.  Naturally, it got a lot of attention .  We all got a kick out of Dad trying to get Bryan to bring home the meat from his fish.  Every phone call home included some form of Dad saying, "All they need at the taxidermy place is the measurements of that fish."

The other quote came from one of the youngest members of the StalkerClan.  As we were heading to the beach Emily asked where was Grandpa Randy.  Jeffery told her Grandpa had to work and wouldn't be going with us.  In a very grown-up tone Emily remarked, "Well, we won't have HIM to deal with today."    Jeffery loved it!  I know Randy heard that at least twenty times before we left and is probably still hearing it daily.

Dinner Discussion

While visiting Jeff and Randy, we made reservations to eat out one night at Corky Bells in Palatka.  Crystal, Jessie and Cason met us there and we all assembled around a large table for eight in the dining area.

With Jeffery and Crystal both present the conversation was not what you would expect at a typical upscale restaurant outing.  Over their orders of blackened mahi mahi and stuffed flounder they proceeded to talk about:

• Jessie's Butt - Jeff had remarked about how recognizable Jessie was from behind and Crystal seemed disturbed that her mother had paid so much attention to her husband's  backside. 
  
  
• Jeff's Bust - When Jeff pulled some money out of the top of her dress Crystal had to tell of all the other things she had seen stored there previously.  According to her there was ample room in Jeff's bra for money, several children's toys, cleaning supplies, and at least one small kitchen appliance. 
  
  
• Jevon's Balls - The story of Jevon talking about his 'boys' in front of Grandma Ratliff, right after she got her hearing aids, was retold.  They even included Jevon's famous remark ... "If it was raining (insert slang for female genitalia) I could reach out and grab a (insert slang for male sex organ).

I could hardly believe what all they talked about, right there in the middle of that fancy restaurant.  I hid my head most of the time.  The odd thing to me was that nobody said anything to discourage them or guide them back to more appropriate topics.  Nary an eyebrow was raised.

As we were finishing our meal, Randy took Cason to wash up and they came back with some candy from the gumball machines.  Crystal went ballistic!  She scolded Randy for getting Cason candy and was admonishing Cason, "Those are like Chicklets, they have gum in the middle, don't swallow the gum!"

In the middle of all this I managed to speak what I think were the only three words I was able to squeeze in during the whole meal.   I looked at Cason and calmly said, "You'll fart bubbles." 

All hell broke loose!  You would think I had cursed an oath in church.  Jennie gave me THE STARE and whispered,  "What's wrong with you, don't you know we are in a public place?"   Jeffery chimed in, "Such language, such language!"  Crystal had to add her part, "What do you mean, talking like that in front of my little guy?"  

Where had they all been for the last hour and a half?

Tough Times on the Trampoline

Jennie and Emerson spent some time playing on the trampoline while we were in Florida.  I'm not sure who had more fun.

 

Fishing Trip Evaluator 2008

This handy guide has been prepared to help the avid fisherman (especially Randy Looney) evaluate the success of their most recent fishing expedition.

INSTRUCTIONS Upon returning from your trip, measure and weigh the largest fish on your stringer. If, like this proud fisherman, your prize catch measures at least 27 inches and weighs 9 lbs 4 ozs or more... YOU HAD A GREAT TRIP. If not, then you went to the WRONG place, you BIG DUMMY!. You should have gone to Randy and Jeff's Combination Fish Farm, Comedy Barn, Homeless Shelter and Reform School just off County Route 315 near Orange Springs, Florida. Call today to make reservations for your next fishing adventure.

Happy Birthday Shawn

Shawn Photos

We all hope you have a great one!

Birthday Boy Blair 'Bear'

 

Happy Birthday to a big boy ...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BLAIR !

Trans-Atlantic Photo Caption Contest

As I understand it, Crystal recently talked Neil and Laura into crossing the Atlantic to visit her and the rest of the Ratliff bunch in Florida.

After spending several months pay and traveling 4,000 miles, this is what he ends up doing in Florida...

What do you suppose is going through his mind when this photo was taken?

Leave your photo captions as comments.  ( Keep it clean though, remember, this is a family website. )

Strawberry Overload

I had heard tales that, if we had a big strawberry crop, I would get reinforcements in handling the strawberry crop.

• I had one sister who came from the North and tried to help me tame this strawberry crop. She and I stayed up past 12:00 midnight eating, capping, eating, jammming, eating, storing in freezer bags and eating until she was almost ready to be hospitalized. She had to go home and lay on her couch to recover.
  
  
• I had one sister who came from the South with blueberries. She grabbed the strawberries that had been picked, threw them into her cooler and headed to the east.
  
  
• I had one brave nephew who brought with him a blond headed Mexican woman. She dilegently crawled through the patch on her belly and picked everything red in the patch, regardless of size or shape.

I don't know if I can make it through blackberry days and watermelon days without some help. The little Mexican girl said she would come back, that is the only bright spot I have. I am about like Daddy said about Uncle Joe... "What a fine bunch of friends I have got!"

Posted by Michelle

Proud Papaw

Sherry says that cousin Clifford Justice came by recently and left this photo of his new grandson.

This is Sirena Lynn's baby, Jaymes James.  
Sherry said that Clifford was really proud of him.

He sure looks like a StalkerClan baby to me.  I can see he has mastered 'lying around' already.  I see a baby carrier in the background so he probably is getting practice at 'sitting around' too. Yes, he looks like a natural for the StalkerClan.