Friday, March 7, 2008

Did I Do That?

Amber called to tell us that our son-in-law had a day that was not to be topped by even the worst day any Stalker/Looney Clan member ever had, or ever will have.  After hearing about his day, I had to agree.

Jevon is a crane operator.  His job is to work on the Bridge of Lions in St Augustine, Fl.  His crane sits on a barge in the Intercoastal.  He has to come off the barge and ride back to dry land each evening.  This one evening, one of the boards he stepped on was loose and he ended up in the water.  And this was on one of the coldest days we have had this year.  Now keep in mind, this is just the start of what is to become a very, very, bad FLY DAY for Jevon.

Bridge of Lions

He got himself out of the water and went to his truck.  He started home and realized that his cell phone was in his pocket and it was soaked.  He used it to call Amber to tell her what had happen. Thinking that the phone was OK, he got out, "Hey Amber, you won't believe what happened to me today.  I fell in to the water and my phone got wet, but apparently it still works."  About that time smoke starts rolling out of his phone and Amber was no longer on the other end. The phone was dead.

He  tried to figure out what happened to his phone.  He pulled the battery off the back and dropped it in the floorboard on the passenger side.  He looked at the battery and all the stuff in the floorboard with it, and decided he would have to go for it or it will be lost forever in all the junk.  He was  crossing over a bridge as he lunged down to get the battery and straightened back up. When he looked up he was on the wrong side of the road.  He pulled the wheel and as he did he heard his rear-view mirror being torn from the truck.  He looked back and all he saw was a cop car with a missing rear-view mirror.  "Oh My Gosh!" (Those are my words, not Jevon's. I am sure he said something a little different.)

His brain went into overdrive.  What should he do?  Should he just keep driving as though nothing happened or should he pull over.  I am sure his inner Amber started gnawing at him saying something like, "Jevon, you better do the right thing or this Fly Day will turn into a Horse Fly Day."

Cop CarHe drove to the end of the bridge and waited on the side of the road for the cop to get to the other end of the bridge, turn around and come back.  He is soaking wet and standing on the side of the road when he hears the sirens coming his way.  He saw the cop car and started flailing his arms in the air.  The cop flew on by Jevon as though he did not see him. 

Now Jevon doesn't know what to do.  He sits beside the road for about 20 minutes waiting for the cop to come back.  He never does.  Finally Jevon was brave enough to go to the closest convenient store he could find.  He gets there and discovers he has no change to use the pay phone.  He dials 911.  The dispatch worker picked up the phone and said, "What is your emergency."

Jevon says, "I am calling to tell you that I just hit a cop car."

Before he can finish the rest of his story, she tells him to hold on one minute.  He can hear the dispatcher talking on the radio to the driver of the damaged cop car, "Hold on, I have your HIT AND RUN on the other line."

Jevon immediately corrects her and demands she take it back, "I am not a HIT AND RUN.  I am here waiting for the cop."

Dispatcher, "Sorry sir, that is just our terminology. Where are you?  We will send someone to you."

Jevon told her his location and hung up the phone.  As he turned around he saw a black guy coming toward him, "Hey Man, can you spare a little money for me?"

"No Man,  just leave me alone.  I have enough trouble without you bothering me.  Just go away and leave me alone."

"In trouble? What kinda trouble you be in white boy?"

"I just hit a cop car."

"A cop car!  White boy, you better leave now and get on down the road!"

"No Man, I'm not leaving.  I just called 911 and told them I was here and they are on their way."

Behind Bars"You did what?  I don't believe you did that!  You are going to JAIL, white boy.  You are going straight to jail."

"No, I'm not!"

"I have a friend that hit a cop car once. Do you know where he is now?  JAIL.  Do you know how long he will be there?  A very long time!  You better run white boy.  Run now and I will say I ain't never saw a thing."

"No, I"m not leaving."

About this time they hear the sirens coming their way.  The black guy took his hands and rubbed his hair back and said,  "You never saw me, white boy."

Four cop cars pull in, the Chief of Police and three more.  The officer who had been in the damaged car stepped out of his car, threw his hands up in the air and started toward Jevon. "What in the %$#^ did you think you were doing?"

"I am so sorry, sir.  It was an accident.  I waited for you at the end of the bridge and you just went on past me.  I waited for you to come back, but you never did."

He went on to tell them about all that had happened to him before the accident. When he was finished the cop lowered his hands and head. When he brought his head back up to speak he said, "Well, to tell you the truth, I was on my cell phone talking and didn't even realize I had been hit, until I tried to look into my rear-view mirror and it was gone.  I didn't ever see you."

After a few more minutes of talk and more apologies, Jevon was told to go on home and not to worry about it.  Honesty is still the best policy after all.  Way to go, Jevon.  We sure are proud of you.

eMail from Jeff

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love the pictures. They make me laugh even harder.
Jeff

Anonymous said...

Hey this sounds like a good day to me. No ticket. No trip to the ER. Does it get any better than that? Good to hear from Amber and Jevon. Hope things are going well for you guys. Love ya.

Anonymous said...

I can only say one thing...ONLY JEVON. Hopefully we can get a computer and get on the clan more frequently. I really miss reading all of our "LOONEY" stories about "STALKERS" begging for money. At least I have my books. Thanks UNCLE CLYDE.
Bye> Traci

Anonymous said...

maybe someone should tell everyone what Jevon's motto is... Traci let that one slip. She says Jevon says that if it's raining "P*ssies", Jevon will grab a D*ck.
I think that says it all. LOL

Crystal

Anonymous said...

Oh, Man!! Jevon is at work right now but i can't wait till he gets home and sees his picture. That is too funny. Yeah, every time i tell Traci a story like that, she says all she can picture is Jevon running around in circles with a smile on his face as it rains "Cats". Then reaches out and grabs a big "hot dog". Hahaha!
Love yall!
Amber

Anonymous said...

I am glad that you are all enjoying my pain and suffering so much. Maybe i should host my own reality show. I will call it, "white boy on the run" This could be my big break. It will put that show "cops" to shame.

Jevon

Anonymous said...

I think it should be called. "White boy that looks like a Black Boy on the run" That tells it like it is. I wish he would count up how many times he was stopped after 911 because the cops thought he was Iranian Poor Baby. He just can't seem to GRAB a break. From some of the other comments he seems to be grabbing at the wrong things!
jeff