I Have Some Place To Be

Last Sunday was Lauren's baby shower. We were to all go to Newberry for the event. Crystal and Amber decided it would be nice to go early and have lunch with Aunt Nancy and Lauren before the shower stared. They went to one of Nancy's favorite restaurants, a place called Floyd's in High Springs. They were dressed really nice and ready for the shower later in the day.

They sat down in a booth. Crystal sat next to Nancy and Amber and Lauren sat across from them. They were having a great time telling stories. I do believe, if memory serves me, I was told that Amber told most of the tales. (I was told afterward by Aunt Nancy, "Oh the things I heard about you. I will never be able to look at you the same again!") Thanks Amber! You are on restrictions. AGAIN!

As the stories were really getting good and the laughter was really on a roll, Amber said she heard a crash and all of a sudden, in slow motion, she saw a large glob of something coming at her. She tried to duck to miss it but was unable to move fast enough. The large glob landed on her pretty top. The only one she had to wear to the shower. Oh, she was so upset!

Now while Amber was busy trying to get the glob off her shirt, Aunt Nancy, Crystal and Lauren were rolling in their seats, tears streaming from their eyes, all fingers pointing toward Amber. They all thought this was hysterical, especially Aunt Nancy. She kept saying, "HA! HA! HA!"

Then, all of a sudden, she realized that whatever happened, happened behind her and she turned to see what it could have been. She quickly turned her head. As she did the back of her head met Crystal's eyes. Crystal's eyes widened and she stopped breathing. The finger she had been pointing at Amber was now busy moving back and forth at the back of Aunt Nancy's head. Her head was covered with specks of tarter sauce. Suddenly, Aunt Nancy turned to see Crystal's finger pointing at her and she said in a frantic voice, "What? What? Is there something in my hair? Somebody tell me! What is in my hair?"

The girls were laughing so hard, they could not tell her!

Again she pleaded, "What is in my hair? DID SOME KID THROW UP IN MY HAIR?" Somebody tell me, do I have throw up in my hair?"

The other three were still unable to speak. The picture of their Aunt Nancy will globs of tarter sauce in her hair was just too much.

The waitress come over and apologized for the tarter sauce and asked if she could help.

Aunt Nancy told her in no uncertain terms, "NO! You can't help me! I HAVE SOMEPLACE TO BE!"

Now you would think that this one bad experience at one of your favorite restaurants would be enough, but no, not for Nancy. She had been unable to eat her sandwich, so she asked for a takeout box.

Waitress:	Well, we really don't have regular take out boxes anymore. We have Chinese boxes.
Nancy:	What is the difference?
Waitress:	One is a regular box and the other is Chinese.
Nancy:	What?
Waitress:	We don't use Styrofoam any more.
Nancy:	Well OK. Just bring me a box.

The waitress comes back with a small Chinese take out box, the kind you get Chinese takeout in. Nancy looks at this small box and looks at her sandwich. How was she going to make this work. Amber said she pushed and tugged at that sandwich and box for ten minutes trying to get it in that box. (If she had just thought to wipe a little of that tarter sauce off her hair and put it on the side of that sandwich, it would have just slid right in.)

Now for the rest of the day Nancy was to be haunted my the smell of her hair treatment. All afternoon if you listened closely you could hear a small voice whimpering in a crowd of women at the shower,

• "Do I smell like mayonnaise?"
• "I smell Mayonnaise!"
• "Does anyone else smell mayonnaise?"

I made the mistake of asking her if she gave the waitress a tip? (A little Michelle came out in me?) Such language! So the best I can translate is, "NO TIP FOR YOU MISSY! I HAVE SOME PLACE TO BE!"

email from Jeff

A few Shower Photos...